Everybody asks why…
What can a person say when confronted with great tragedy? We always want to find meaning in death or any kind of loss. What if there are no answers? What if nothing you can say or think will take away the shock, anger or pain? Human relationships are never perfect. There is always something you wish you had not said. There is always a feeling of guilt after someone dies. Why wasn’t I there? Why did I treat him / her that way? I wish I could communicate how I feel. I wish I could kick your ass, I wish I could give you a hug. Why did you leave me here to ask why?
Suicide is the worst of these tragedies. The survivors suffer terribly. In most tragic deaths we can find some sort of meaning. When a colleague or friend is murdered we can console ourselves that the perpetrator is dead themselves, or is facing judgment. If a fellow Soldier dies in combat we can say: ah, this was an honorable death, in the line of duty. These things do not make the grieving easier, but it makes facing the grief easier. Also, we do not feel the self blame we do when a friend commits suicide.
Numbers
Why do Soldiers commit suicide? According to USA Today, Soldier suicides were 17 incidents per 100,000 in 2003(Zoroya 2003.) According to the Centers for Disease Control this is roughly 7 more per 100,000 than the general population. That may seem insignificant, but it is very alarming considering the relative small size of the military community. Suicide is a significant cause of death in the United States, it ranks as number eleven. From 1980 to 1995 there were eighty total deaths from lightning strikes in the U.S, during that period there were roughly eighty deaths per day from suicide. Forty percent more people die from suicide than homicide.
Stressors
Why do Soldiers commit suicide? The suicide rate for the Army is consistent for deployed and non-deployed Soldiers. Suicide occurs in training battalions, and in home station. Enlisted Soldiers commit suicide the most, officers and warrant officers the least. The amount of time in service seems irrelevant. Regular Army, National Guard and Reserves have the same suicide rate. Married Soldiers commit suicide less than single Soldiers.
The life of a Soldier is the life of stress management, and we do not always do well. Many have seen combat in the last several years, those who haven’t are likely to. Some Soldiers work in very stressful offices. Others work in stressful field conditions. No matter what conditions Soldiers work in, the life of the Soldier is summed up in one statement: long periods of boredom followed by brief moments of sheer terror. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is endemic, as are mood disorders and physical ailments. Over six percent of the National Guard is medically non-deployable on any given day. (GAO-06-105) Army members and National Guard simply take poor care of themselves.
Physically demanding, emotionally and spiritually draining, not always fulfilling, the life of a Soldier is a difficult one. Compound this lifestyle with a pre-existing mood disorder or impulse control disorder and you have a recipe for disaster.
We do not study suicide much scientifically; there have been five U.S. studies in the last fifty years. Everyone tries to prevent suicide on a case by case basis, but as a policy we tend to ignore it. Therapists tend to error on the side of caution, but laymen rarely catch on with co-workers or family. Everyone gets caught off guard by suicide; no one really sees it coming. More people die of suicide than AIDS, but precious few research dollars go to this blight.
Stigmata
Suicide bears a universal stigma; it seems that we as a species disrespect those who violate their own instinct for survival. Dishonor and shame are the feelings most associated with a suicidal death. Sometimes people rationalize that it is better to lie about a family members suicide than to tell the truth.
In the early fifth century the Catholic Church and many civil authorities were struggling with a group of religious zealots called the Donatists. These men believed that by either killing themselves or forcing someone else to kill them they could go to heaven with Christ. The problem got so bad both the Church and the civil authorities passed laws against suicide, denying Christian burial to anyone who took their own life.
Whatever the rationale or circumstances surround a suicidal death, we need to be cognizant of the needs and the feelings of the families affected. Anything less is a dereliction of duty. To the religious out there I would strongly caution against any kind of statement of dogma, which may color the families perception of the deceased. That is not your duty. Just be there for the bereaved.
In the end
I have no idea why Soldiers or anyone else commit suicide. All I know for a fact is the effect is painful and far reaching. There do seem to be factors in common with many suicidal deaths. It would appear that first of all, a person must develop a terrifying pain threshold. The borderline patient or the person with mood disorders has to work up several self destructive attempts before a lethal one can be made. These “calls for help” should be heeded. (Joiner 2005) If you notice someone regularly drinking themselves into a stupor this can be a buildup of this sort. The most striking commonality is the perceived sense the suicidal have that they no longer belong, that they have become ineffective. A loss of perceived worthiness or a distancing from friends and family is especially troubling. This may be why divorce or job loss often precipitates suicide attempts. I guess the overall point I am trying to make is that there may be a disease process in play that subrogates blame from the suicidal patient to the family mezzo system or the macro-systems in play. This does not mean that any one individual should shoulder the burden of blame; this means that suicide is a human disease, and a tragedy of perplexing proportions. I really cannot express this opinion in any less technical terms.
Biblical Understanding
The pulpits have been either silent or judgmental when addressing this issue. The modern church should be ashamed of the lack of preaching or bible study related to this subject. The Bible records six suicides that I can find. I will concentrate on three.
Judas Iscariot a gentile by the way, have you ever known ancient Jews to have surnames? Judas killed himself out of guilt after betraying the Lord. One question; if he had not, would the Lord not have forgiven him just as he did Peter?
King Saul fell on his own sword rather than let the Philistines take him. David and the house of Israel wept bitterly for Saul, gave him a kingly hero’s burial. I see no condemnation of Saul for his suicide in itself.
Samson the judge pushed the pillars down on the Philistines, in so doing he effectively committed suicide. I will rest my case of the judgment of Samson on Hebrews chapter eleven.
The scripture I would like to use to comfort any believer whose family member committed suicide is Romans 8:38-39 “For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (KJV) It is obvious to me to note a few things. First off suicide is as prevalent within the church as it is in the general population. Next would be that if neither death nor any living creature can separate us from the love of God, then neither can we by killing ourselves.
Having said that, and reiterating that you will not go to hell for committing suicide, I do need to say this. Suicide is self murder, and a sin against God. You will be held to account for the pain and suffering you cause the Lord and your family. There is no reason why you should not seek help and counseling. You are the temple of the Holy Spirit 1Corinthians 6:19 “What? Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost [which is] in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?” (KJV) Also, you were creating in the image of God. (Genesis 1:26) Therefore you have a dignity derived from Yahshua and it cannot be taken lightly. Your life is sacred just like other life around you. From the dispensation of government we derive the fact that suicide is a criminal act, see Genesis 9:5.
Chasidic traditions teach that every soul was created with a specific mission here on Earth, in general to bring light into the darkness. Suicide circumvents your mission on Earth and since your time has not come, and your soul has no body to go back to, you may end up in limbo. I am not sure I subscribe to this theology except to say that in Orthodox Judaism suicide is specifically prohibited.
Finally
You never know what you have until it is gone. This is most obvious with death. Two people I know who were killed both left me sad and mortified by their departure. One took his own life, and the other, she was murdered. I was really not aware of how much of an impact either of these people had on my life until they were gone. Had the man who committed suicide only known, what an impact he had on others, how sorry we would be to see him go…
I do not think he would have done it.
This entry is dedicated to Robert.
References
Simmons, Shraga (n. d.) Burying a Suicide, Ask The Rabbi, reprinted from http://judaism.about.com/library/3_askrabbi_o/bl_simmons_burysuicide.htm
Joiner, Thomas (2005) Why People Die by Suicide, Cambridge, MA, Harvard University Press
Zoroya, Gregg (2003) Army Probes Soldier Suicides, Reprinted from USA Today
Dobson, James (2001) Talking to Kids About Suicide, http://listen.family.org/askdrbill/A000000325.cfm
Phipps, William (1985) Christian Perspectives on Suicide, http://www.religion-online.org/showarticle.asp?title=1924
Understanding Suicide www.cdc.gov/ncipc/pub-res/Suicide%20Fact%20Sheet.pdf
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